Waiting for God.

Thursday, June 11, 2009. Do you know the situation where you wait for something, but it does not happen? I know this situation from important branching points of my life. When I was around 20 years old I was looking for a partner, but somehow it did not happen. The right person did not appear in my life. There were women around, and many of them quited attractive. But somehow it did not fit. So I had to wait for nearly ten years until things suddenly changed. I am now married for 12 years to a fantastic woman and we have three absolutely great children! Sometimes waiting pays.

You might be waiting for something similar or for something completely different. Some people wait for the time when they find the right job. Others wait for friends, for the end of some education, for the time when they are old enough to determine important things themselves. You might also be waiting for God, to show you who he is, to get to know him better, to find the courage to make a commitment to him.

We might be waiting for God to change our personal situation. Perhaps we need healing. Or we just want him to talk to us, to lead us on, to bring change into our life. Or we want him to calm us down, to give us peace somewhere, to lead us away from the heavy waves of this time.

I have been waiting to be able to hear God's voice for quite a while, even after I became a Christian. I wanted to live with God. I wanted to hear more from him, wanted to understand what he thinks about our daily life. I did not want to feel lonly and far away from him, connected only through texts which have been written 2000 years ago. No, I wanted him to be the living God which he claims to be. The living God is living today, he is a part of my life. And again - after a long time of waiting and praying, things suddenly changed. It was as if a blanket was lifted from my eyes, as if an earplug was taken out of my ears. There was his voice, daily. I could suddenly hear him in the biblical texts, but speaking as if he would be speaking right now. I could hear him speaking through events. I could even hear him in my own prayer, reflecting his thoughts into my spirit by his holy spirit.

If you are able to listen to God, it does not mean that you are suddenly better. But it means that you realize much better how far away most parts of your life still are from his clear and warm love, truth and reliability. I must say that the waiting time paid here as well. I know that he is there even if I do not feel him. I know that faith is not about seeing, but about trusting when you do not see or hear. It is about loving him daily because we know that we can trust him. It is about learning from him while we are waiting for him - since in fact he is waiting for us to turn to him and to grow into maturity, such that the next step on our path with him can be taken. [R.W.E.P., jesusnetwork.eu]

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